To tell you guys the truth I’m basically two people. I nurture two personalities inside me. The aboriginal “I” is what I primarily am and the contemporary “other I” is what I have become as a result of hobnobs with people over a period of time.
The “I” is the child in me, the lover, the romantic, the sportsman, the charmer, the activator, the artist, the dancer, the impulsive fighter, the notorious risk-taker, rustic, free and pure.
The “other I” in me is responsible, careful, intelligent, communicative, patient, accommodating, compromising, sociable, impressive, controlled, conscious and aware.
I cannot concoct which part of me is speaking as I pen down these thoughts .Maybe it’s a brainchild of both personalities slapped together. However, what I do know is that the fundamental difference between the two is that the “I” in me lives while the “other I” manages. One “I” feels while the “other I” thinks.
I have realized that as I am growing older the “other I” is becoming more dominant. I am responsible and watch out for my folks, I respect people, I understand and I care. But there are times when I just want to cut myself some slack and put my feet up, do nothing meaningful, kick some ass or just lounge around watching a couple of movies back to back.
I guess somewhere down the line I forgot the “I” and became a man with a perpetual mask. I started believing that the mask is my real face because everyone else believes so. I started believing in others more than I believed in myself. I started getting comfort in this discomfort because I am not the only one wearing a mask. I am surrounded by an entire race of masqueraders.
These are the repercussions of neglecting the first “I”. It’s like curbing my natural instincts and projecting my acquired self all the time. Now that’s a serious imbalance which leads to an “inner conflict”. And this inner conflict is the root cause of a lot of disturbance in our lives. It is this conflict that makes us helpless and we lower the boom on our parents, spouses, government or even the almighty when something is amiss. It’s this inner conflict that makes us mediocre.
I am not suggesting that the “other I” is wrong. It is as much a part of me as the “natural I”. But truth be told, the more I feed my “other I” the more it will keep shrinking my “I” thus spiriting away the essential ROMANCE WITH LIFE.
Now the big question is how do I tackle this challenge? How do I resolve this “inner conflict”? Well, the answer is simple yet not easy. We have to make a list.
All the activities that we do in our lives can be divided into two categories namely “things I have to do” and “things I want to do”
A few examples for things I have to do could be – going to office, paying bills, travel for work, exercise (for some) or daily household chores.You don’t have a choice but to do these things.
Things I want to do comprise of things I love doing like playing tennis, watching movies, going for a drive, spending time with your children, dancing and hanging out with friends to list a few.I believe both the lists are important but the “want to do” list gives me energy to take care of my “have to do” list. One charges, while the other discharges.
Imagine a life full of discharging activities. If you dislike others, if you feel this world is a mean place, life is overburdened, people don’t understand you, there is politics in your workplace and nobody cares for you. It’s just that you are not charged enough.
You need to stop, take stock and start doing things that you really want to do. In short, take care of your “I”. Get your balance back and try to resolve the inner conflict. We are responsible for our state. We cannot control every incident that takes place in our lives but we can definitely control how we choose to respond to those incidents. Our response is better if we are charged enough.
So get up and make that call you always wanted to make. Go, watch a movie alone! Catch up with your college buds for a drink. Pull out those studs and kick some mean soccer ass. Get your bicycle repaired. Go for a walk with your mom.
Go, romance your life again. Be the romantic you are….. Once again!
Today is the first day of the rest of your life!
Note: happy people have a lot of common activities in their “have to” and “want to” lists.
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